Recently, for the past two weeks, I've been talking to more boys than I ever had in my whole entire pathetic seventeen years of life. Cool, right? Just a little. The catch is that it's all mostly been done through the masses of social networking sites, my cell phone, or webcam, not at the parties where I totally slut it up. "Pretty lame." Well, that's what I would have thought about a month ago. It actually happens to be very entertaining, in a good or hilarious way, depending on the situation. But sometimes, it can get really hot. I'll break it down to my five favorite boys so far:
1. The first boy I talked to was Zero. He was a seventeen year old boy with a handsome five o’ clock shadow, trying to make it in the world as an aspiring model slash business entrepreneur with rich boy family problems. But in the end, anyway, everything listed above and especially my ethnic looks ruined everything after two days of cooing texts and calling me “babe.” Lame.
2. This second boy takes the cake and more. But unlike everyone else, I’m going to use his real name since this should be a warning to all my readers. Vincent, or Doctor as he calls himself, was pretty normal. We spent over a week chatting about videogames and other boy junk. Way platonic. The only plus was that he was an emaciated, curly q. (Totally my type.) But one day, actually yesterday, I get a message from him, saying that he wanted to shove an appendage down my throat. I decide to reply with a smiley face, with the pestering of my gay best friend Alessandro. Not a wise move obviously. The next time I heard from him, before I went on internet lockdown on his crazy, was that he wanted me to choke on it. Bestiality, much? No. But close enough for me.
3. Boy three is too cool so I had to include him. And everything is strictly and seriously platonic this time…Although I’m totally suspecting that he’s cheating on his girlfriend but whatever. His name is Allan and he loves to rave and all we do is send each other music and shuffle videos. Totally biffuhl status. You better watch out, Alessandro.
4. I should have left boy number four alone from the start. I mean, really, I hate hipsters; why bother? And he goes to one of the number one party schools in the world! If those two factors didn’t send me any signals, I don’t know what will. So to make a short story even shorter, he wanted me to send some na$ty pictures, which I didn’t, so he called me a fucking tease and left me alone. It was totally like a Dov Charney case. Creepy and douche-like.
5. I saved my favorite for last. Jude. He’s practically perfect in every way. Hair, body, smile, everything. Totally corny but hot. I actually lost my virginity to him three days ago. Well, cybering virginity that is. And he’s the first boy to show me his (HUGE) member. So…really, he’s the only boy I do this kind of thing with although I totally doubt it’s the same on his end, but whatever it’s totally, totally hot. He knows what gets me going and I would like to think that I know him well enough too; especially when he lowers/closes his eyes and begins to breathe heavily. It's amazingly hot. Total dream.